Anna. This is Jack. 3 reports. I'll start. Today was tense for Alice and Me; we wanted that C on the papers so much. Frank's class was at nine and Alice and I watched out the window for Frank. I saw him running down the sidewalk with his left fist in the air like when he scored a touchdown. I felt good!! Now Frank is going to tell you what happened. I told him not to worry about exact quotes, just get the point across.
Anna this is Frank. I went to class almost sick at my stomach. I was scared. Dr. Ellison came in and said "all of you did a good job, but we had only 2 A's. The first goes to Emily, her papers were good with almost no errors on first or second draft." Emily sits next to me and calls me Sandy because she says she likes my short hircut and the color. Then Dr. Ellison said " the second A goes to Frank". I almost cried. He said "this writing hits you in the gut" For some reason the class started to clap. Maybe they had seen me cleaning tables in the student union. Maybe they knew I was kind of poor, maybe they saw how I struggled, maybe some one told then how old I was and they thought I was a Iraq war soldier. They wanted me to do good. A couple of the students yelled out let us read his papers. Dr. Ellison said "Frank paper is for mature audiences. So maybe in a couple of years. The others fake booed. Then he said "Plus Frank and I have got to discuss the book rights." When He left several of the students there are 18 stopped by and patted my head, I was still sitting down. Emily stood up and gaave me a peck on the forhead and said "good job Sandy." He also told all of us to thank our first readers. He said "I think Franks reader is trying to get my job." He thinks my reader was Jack. They met once at a party. I am so thankful to All of you, and maybe that other Person. Jack dont' sensor this. I am going to try and call Emily for a date. Her dad is a doctor in Saint Louis so maybe he has not heard bad things about me. If she goes out with me I promise I will not to anything wrong, but I cannot promise I will not have a bad thought or two. I wish this were my birthday so I could say how excited I am. Thanks Anna a 100000000 times.
this is alice. i think frank forgot some of your english lessons, but i don't think he's on earth right now. you should take great pride in what you did for him. may god bless you. keep in touch.
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anna, i wanted to add one thing. i think i was blessed in taking care of frank. and you should be blessed for what you did. alice
ReplyDeleteWOO HOO! Yay! I'm so happy for you, Frank. I thought you deserved an A for those papers; I'm so glad Dr. Ellison agreed. And he said it just right, "this writing hits you in the gut". That was exactly how I felt. Yippee!
ReplyDeleteI hope Emily goes out with you. :) And don't worry too much about your thoughts; just keep trying to think of her as a real lady and treat her that way, too. If you do that, the rest of your thoughts should take care of themselves.
You seem to worry a lot about your age, so let me tell you something. When I was in high school, age was a HUGE deal. Going out with someone who was just one grade above you would be considered cool, and people mostly hung out with people in their own grades. It was a little bit "weird" to have your best friends be someone from a different grade. Being friends with someone who was, say, 3 years older than you, was almost unheard-of.
And then I went to college. And suddenly I discovered that age didn't matter so much. I made friends with a guy who was three or four years older than me and friends with another guy who was two years younger than me. And no one thought I was weird; it was all normal. The people in my classes weren't all the same age, at all. So I don't think you don't need to be at all embarassed if you aren't 18 or 19. You never know; maybe some of your classmates aren't 18 or 19, either, but you don't know it because they haven't said their age. Just going to college at all is doing well; you don't need to worry about when in your life you're doing it.
Congratulations again on your A!
God bless,
Anna
Anna Thanks again a million times. I could not have done it without you. Your spelling-grammar tips were so good, and your encouragement was the greatest. I want to thank Jack for sending me to you. Frank-Sandy.
ReplyDeleteWell, you're welcome, Frank-Sandy. :)
ReplyDeleteGod bless,
Anna
FANTASTIC!! Frank, you rock! :) Congratulations on your well-deserved A--it's great that Dr. Ellison recognized you in front of the class. Best of luck on asking Emily out, too. She should be so lucky! :) You're an amazing man, and it shows. And being older will be a great advantage to you--you'll be more mature than your younger male classmates, and thus WAY more interesting to the women. ;) Enjoy your triumph!
ReplyDeleteCaitilin. Thank you very much. Your comments were a big help. My one worry is that if she will go out with me she might find out what I have written. How could I explain about wetting the bed. Frank
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteShe won't remember that about your stories--I didn't until you mentioned it. ;) What's amazing about what you have written is not what has happened to you: it's the man you have become because/in spite of what's happened to you. How many people are thankful for the things you are--for an unrelated older couple, for getting real criticism, for your parents (BOTH of them, even) though they are imperfect, etc, etc? If Miss Emily reads your stories and dislikes you because of them then you KNOW that she is not the girl for you anyway. :) No, I wouldn't worry about it--she'll be impressed with your courage and forthrightness, and any, er, "mishaps" will be forgotten. If I had a single sister, I'd send her your way. :) Keep us posted! Also, are you taking another writing class next semester? I would like to read more of your writing.
Anna Caitlin. It is really nice to have people to help you. Can I take a little more of your time.
ReplyDeleteA girl in my history class called last night and told me to keep it secret but Emily wants me to ask her out and said I was cute. Is that alright. Or is she saying I am baby like?
My mother takes orders at a cafe. I hate the word wa..ess. If she ask should I tell her what my mother does.?
If she has been told about my scars what shoud I say, I could not tell her why I was whipped. I am going to call her tonight,if you have a minute or two could you advice me. Frank I hope you don't think I am a nusiance.
Frank,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry I didn't see this earlier. Being cute is a good thing; I've often used that word to describe guys that are good-looking.
Why would you hate the word waitress? I think it's best if you don't be ashamed about things; the only things to be ashamed of are things that are sins, and even those, once we confess them and are absolved, we shouldn't be anxious about.
I don't know why she would have been told about your scars. If you don't feel comfortable talking to her about that, then just don't bring it up. If she brings it up for some reason, just tell her you're not comfortable talking about it. If you keep going out with her, you might get to the point where you are comfortable sharing things with her, but most relationships don't start out that way at the beginning, and that's ok.
And you're not a nuisance. At all.
God bless,
Anna
Anna. You have got to be the nicest person in the world. I was afraid we had lost contact. Your answer about the scars was great. You are right I should not be asamed my mother is waitress, but sometimes people look down on that.Some kids in high school would tese me about that job. But I have to grow up and you sure are helping me. Frank Our date is tomorrow night. She said she would be delighted to go out with me. Delighted is a little fancy for me.But I liked it.
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteI am sorry I missed this yesterday, too, but I totally agree with what Anna said--your mother is nothing to be ashamed of (unless you are ashamed of eating in restaurants! :) ) and your scarring shouldn't even come up on a first date, or for several dates after that, if you end up there.
And delighted means more because it's fancy--it's like she didn't just say "yes," she said "YES!!!" I hope that your date goes well. My additional suggestions for being gentlemanly are to be sure to hold the doors for her, to help her on with her coat (if she wears one), to let her order first (if you go out to eat), and at the end of the date (even if it doesn't go as well as you'd hoped), be sure to thank her for spending the evening with you. And DON"T WORRY! ;) It's better and easier to talk and be friendly if you're not worrying about what she's thinking. Just be yourself, and that will be perfect. Let us know how it goes. It's nice to "talk" to you--you're never a nuisance.
Peace!
Anna Caitlin. I got kind of scared. I thought maybe you had cut me off. I am glad you found me. I will stay on this post for a while. Alice has got some other problems so I really need your help. Sometimes I feel like I have died and gone to haven. I am nervous about tonight but really looking forward to our date. This is one of my first dates with a kind of classy girl. I think most other girls might have been looking for something else and usually I did not let them down. Your tips are so good. I did not sleep good last night, I am nervous and excited. When Alice pulled my foot this morning, I jumped. I hope I do well, I will let uou know. Thanks Frank
ReplyDeleteanna, caitilin, frank has left for his date. he worries that he sounds lika a baby. jack told him ,"you proved you were a 'man' at 15, but now you have got to learn to be a gentleman." that is harder but with help he is going to make it. the only time jack spoke harshly to him was when a 38 year old divoree, who had taken frank out at 18 and we can guess what happened,called at our house and ask him out. jack said,"man, we are not trying to run your personal life, but this is definitely out of bounds." sometimes i wish god had not made him so appealing looking. but i will continue to pray for him and i'm confident we will all be proud. sometimes i think the way he was brought up was child abuse. not just the beatings but no guidance about relationship with the opposite sex. thank you. i may erase this later. i have some other worries but he is in good hands with you two. thanks anna and caitilin.
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteI am kind of a busy person (we have 5 kids 10 and under) so I don't always get to the computer as often as I would like, but you don't need to worry that I have "cut you off." Some days are just busier than others. I know that Anna also has small children, so we're in similar situations at home. Can't wait to hear about your date! I am sure you are doing us proud.
Peace!
Caitilin
Anna Catilin. Today at church I prayed you would stay with me. I told Alice to leave her post up. I was old enough to know better and I want you to know some of the worst about me. If you think I am more bad than you thought forgive me.
ReplyDeleteMy date was great. Emily treated me like a real gentlemen.It was far more fun than my other experiences. When I took her back to her sorority house she put her hand on my neck and kissed me again on the forhead like she did in class. She asked me to a party next Friday at her sorority. If you still like me tell me to go or not, I never been to anything like that, maybe its over my head right now. Help me on this one. Frank
Frank,
ReplyDeleteLike Caitlin is, I'm busy enough that I can't get to the computer all the time. I still want to respond to several comments Jack and others have made, but haven't been up to doing that kind of thinking recently. So if I take awhile to respond sometimes, don't let yourself worry that it means I've "dropped" you.
I'm happy your date went well. That's exciting!
I have no idea if you should go to the sorority party or not. I was never in a sorority, so I don't know what the party will be like. Why don't you ask Jack and Alice for their advice? My first instinct would be to say yes, go, and enjoy it. If there's alcohol, don't drink much, because impaired judgement can lead to things you'll regret later.
You said:
Emily treated me like a real gentlemen.It was far more fun than my other experiences.
Remember that you said this. If you go to the party, or pretty much any time you're thinking about her or doing something with her, both of you will find it more rewarding if you each treat the other as a real gentleman/lady. It sounds like you're off to a great start with this. It will probably get hard eventually, but keep up the good work, because it's worth it. :)
God bless,
Anna
Anna Caitilin. I am really sorry. I did not mean you have to respond very soon. I guesss I just am afraid you will find me someone you do not want to be around. When I say something take all the time you need. If you are too busy I will understand. Alice said the same thing you said, there probably will be drinking, but that is one thing I do not do hardly at all. So it is my job to not be taken in. I know Emily does not drink. You know I kind of want to go but I have to trust myself. I could not stand you thinking more bad of me than you probably already do. I believe you will stay with me like Jack and Alice. You have famililies and they come first. Maybe I am asking too much, so respond only when you can. Frank
ReplyDeleteHi Frank,
ReplyDeleteI am glad that your date with Emily went well. That's really great--I am glad that you had a good time! My advice about the sorority party is to find out (if you can--ask another student, or maybe your adviser, but try to find out) what the "Greek culture" is like on your campus. I went to a state school, and all the frat boys and sorority girls were kind of their own "group," and they did LOTS of drinking (and the other dumb/bad things that go along with it). I am not saying that this is what it's like where you are--there is a lot of room for variety; but if I were in the situation at my old school that you are at yours, I would probably not go, because the "greek culture" was very clique-y. That is not my advice about what you should do, just my personal experience. You should try to find out what they are like, like I said, and make your decision from there.
Also, if you don't necessarily feel like you'd be comfortable at that event, you can say to Emily that you are like Garth Brooks ("not good on the social graces") ;) and would rather go on another date where it's just the two of you until you get to know each other better. I would find a dance like that, even at the best sorority, a bit overwhelming, but that's just me! :) You do what FEELS right to you, and then you'll do what's right.
Also, I just want to say, don't feel like you've got to apologize to me for taking my time--I CHOOSE to do this, and I enjoy it. You really feel like a "real person," as do Alice and Jack, and it's really nice to make a friend far away. I do NOT feel that you are asking too much, and I didn't want to make you feel like you were; if I did, I am very sorry. I was trying to be reassuring, not dismissive. I don't think badly of you at all--any mistakes you have made you regret, and are trying to avoid making again. Who could do any better than that? I think you're a great guy, and I like talking to you.
I hope that Alice and Jack are doing well. Please tell them I said hello. Let us know what you decide about the sorority dance. I am excited to hear! :)
Peace!
Caitilin
Caitlin. Thank you so much. I wanted Alice to tell you that story of the older women because it seems so aweful to me today and I thought maybe it would make you sick, and I needed to be reassured. I really am a baby in so many ways and I would never grow up without friends who don't think I am too hopeless. Thanks again. Frank
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteYou said:
I guess I just am afraid you will find me someone you do not want to be around.
You know God always wants to be around you, right? Who am I to disagree with him? :)
As for the party, trusting yourself is probably not going to happen all at once; at some point, you will just have to go to a party and see if you hold up to the temptation or not. Doing it when you know you have people that you really don't want to disappoint might actually help keep you safe, give you extra motivation to act in good conscience. Don't go if you don't think you're ready, though, and if you do go, and once you're there, you feel uncomfortable or strongly tempted, then leave. (It might be awkward to leave, but better that than let something worse happen).
As for thinking bad of you, like Caitlin, I probably think a lot better of you than you realize. Everyone does things which they either are ashamed of, or ought to be ashamed of. But most people don't try to change and become better. You are doing that, and I think that's very impressive.
And, too, don't feel like you are imposing on my time. I enjoy talking with you. I'm eager to hear if you go to the party or not, if you do how was it, etc.
God bless,
Anna
Anna Caitlin. Nature cancelled the dance. No power so no dance, instead Emily came over to our condo. She met Jack and Alice and meg and Jimmy and the grandchildren. We all got along great. Anna Caitlin I do like her so much and she says she really likes Sandy. This is going to be one of the hardest tests of my life. I am glad the story of the older women did not cause you to cut me off, I need everybody I can find to help me. Emily calls almost every day. Pray for me. Frank
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteI'm praying for you. Keep your hopes up. :)
God bless,
Anna
Please stay with me. I dont' understand Jack and Jeff fight. I will only say this. I have never met any one as kind as Jack. Frank
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear that nature ruined the plans, but glad that you got to introduced Emily to the family. I am glad that things are going well so far. I will be praying for you too. And for what it's worth, I don't "get" the fight Jack and Jeff are in either. I am just waiting for it to blow over... :) Keep talking! I will be without email for a couple of days, beginning Wednesday, to travel to my sister's wedding, but I will check back when I get there. Stay warm! And, you call her too, right?
Peace,
Caitilin
Anna Caitlin. Jack and Alice are really glad you are helping me. You have families and to help me is something special. Emily is going back to Saint Louis in a few days then her parents are bringing her back here. What can I tell them, my bad past the older women. What if they find out, what would you do with one of your kids if they liked a person like me. I am really scared. Will this always follow me. I am really scared. Alice and Jack are so close to me like a real mother and father they need your advice like I do. I know your first job is your family. Maybe you could consider me a distant counsin in a corner. I hate to ask you to take on something like me but I hope you can help me.I hate to be a problem.But sometime they are going to find out about me and my past and so is Emily. I think she has heard a little.When I have kids I am not sure I would want them to be friends with someone like me. I got my grades and they are above a c average. I did not think I could do it. Thank you. Frank
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteI will think over my answer while I am traveling tomorrow, and post later. What you must remember is that EVERYONE sins, makes mistakes, screws up royally. To act as if you are beyond forgiveness is a serious sin--no one is as bad as God is good! :) I will think about a better answer, but my first response is be honest about yourself. You've grown and matured a lot, and would not make the same mistakes again. Don't worry so much! :)
Take care,
Caitilin
anna, caitilin. jack tried to tell you, anna, how he felt about a child's illness. such has always upset him tremendously, but he does not know how to comment on your blog.
ReplyDeletei am very interested in both your opinions on frank's past and your reaction as mothers. i must be brutally honest:knowing his background i would be reluctant to let my daughter go out with him. jack and i love him as a son, but we see him every day and we know what he is in reality---just a great young man. but others may not see this. please give me your honest opinions. i would appreciate that. alice
Frank,
ReplyDeleteI know it's a serious question, but part of me wants to laugh. Maybe you should be talking to my dad rather than me. I married a guy with a "past" that's somewhat like Frank's. He even has a daughter. (Well, ok, he has 3 daughters now, but he had one before he met me). And he's 14 years older than me, to boot. So maybe it's not too surprising that my dad had some reservations about him. But I'm very happy with him.
What you should do, Frank, is do everything you can to prove to both Emily and her parents that you are no longer the guy that you used to be. Show them by your actions that you have changed and that you will treat Emily like the lady she is, with dignity and respect at all times. (It will probably help if you try to treat the parents with respect, too).
If any of them bring it up, tell them that you know that what you did in the past was a mistake, and that you will try hard not to make those mistakes again. Keep trying to be the man that Emily deserves, the kind of man whom you would want your child to date.
If you do that, then it is in their hands. Even if you try your best, it may not be enough for them. That's their choice, and there's not anything else you can do about it. But don't assume that they will reject you; I am proof positive that guys with pasts can still get good women. ;)
For myself, if one of my daughters wants to date someone who I knew had a past like yours, this is how I would probably respond. Anyone who wants to date my underage daughters has to meet me, take her on formal dates to public places, and generally be supervised with her. If I knew he had a past, I'd be even more stringent on my supervision, I think, maybe not letting them alone much. If my daughter was an adult and moved out, then I would express some reservations, tell her to be careful. That she could give the guy a chance if she likes him, but that it might be a good idea to resist opportunities for temptation. Something like that.
Anyhow, those are my thoughts. Good luck. God bless.
Anna
Oh, and about leaving a comment on my blog. (By the way, my kids are improving).
ReplyDeleteWhen you see a post that you want to leave a comment on, look along the bottom of the post, and click where it says "leave a comment". This will take you to a page that shows the post again. If you scroll down to the bottom, there is an area for writing a message. (It even has the word "message" right next to it.)
Just above the box for writing the message there should be three options written in bold. "Anonymous", "OpenID", and "Logged in user". If "Anonymous" is not already clicked, then click on that one. That way you won't have to sign in. You can still leave your name in the message if you want.
Then just hit the "Post Comment" button underneath the message box.
If you have more troubles with this, let me know what the trouble is specifically, and I'll see if I can help.
God bless,
Anna
anna, jack has let me have the computer. your advice as always was excellent.i just hope emily's parents are at least a little tolerant. you know sometimes i think it is a curse to look like frank and have his athletic abilities. but it moves me to tears when i see how he is trying. last night he said something i thought was rather profound: he said he felt a real change when the priest and i changed his clothes. before that he would have been embarassed but then he was thankful. i think he is saying "our bodies are important, but so is our spirit" or something like that. alice
ReplyDeleteFrank,
ReplyDeleteOne more thing you can do. Keep praying. Pray every day, asking God for the grace to stay on the right path. And believe that he will give you that grace, because he is as eager for you to do what's right as you are. You don't have to try to do this all by yourself; you have the most powerful one in the universe helping you.
Alice,
It's great to watch someone maturing spiritually, isn't it? :)
God bless both of you,
Anna
anna, i am so proud of frank. you will never know what you mean to him. dump jack and me if you have to but please, please stay with frank. i am quite aware that some bloggers laugh at us. so maybe we should put some jolly posts on. but jack will never tell me anything that will put a burden on me. that is one of his weaknesses. alice
ReplyDelete